A Man Walked Into A Bar
by Zoser
Summary: Short pieces, very short pieces. The only thing that unites these tales is a bar. Sam and Jack as usual.
1. Chapter 1

**HANSON**

**Washington D.C.**

Jonas Hanson walked into a bar with the last thing he had heard in the car radio, one of the Zombie's songs, on his lips.

_What's your name_

_What's your name_

_Who's your daddy_

_Who's your daddy *_

Oh he knew what her name was and best yet who her daddy was, her real daddy - a general.

And there she was so young and beautiful. She had the look of the socially unsure and inexperienced and, hopefully, easily dominated.

A general for a father-in-law, what could be better for his career.

First he'd have to cut her from the gaggle of her friends. She'd need to learn to depend on him, not them, for companionship and advice.

When ever she had free time she would learn to think first of him. And what he wanted and he needed.

And then she'd learn to think only of him, and his wants and needs. Not her career, not her friends, not her family.

She was military, she would learn to do as she was told. It might take time but this mission was going to be fun.

*Time of the Season by Rod Argent of the Zombies


	2. Chapter 2

**JACK**

**Colorado Springs**

Jack walked into the base's local watering hole for a little company and a drink before going home to his empty house. He was alternately freaked out about this new job and anxious to get started - forming a team and having a mission, a purpose.

The place was usually pretty tame except for game nights. But tonight there was a noisy crowd around one table with two people, whom he couldn't quite see. He could see cash changing hands.

Seeing a fellow special operator Jack pointed at the crowd and asked.

"What's up, Harlan?"

"She's just about cleaned out every one playing pool. Now she's taking the rest of their lunch money arm wrestling."

"A girl, these guys are letting a girl beat them?"

"She's drop dead gorgeous. I think they get distracted and lose concentration. You must have a few bucks, Jack, wanna try your luck?"

At that half the crowd groaned and the other half cheered as money changed hands. The defeated man stood up and wandered off to the bar.

Jack got a look at the 'girl' and said "Girl? Harlan, that's a woman."

Harlan was right about one thing, she was drop dead gorgeous. What the hell was she doing in this bar? Was she trolling for fly boys?

She looked up at him and smiled, a dazzling smile. He shook his head and loped off to the bar. He was here just for a beer.

His life was beginning to gel and he wasn't ready for any entanglements. And that 'girl' looked like trouble.


	3. Chapter 3

**JACK **

**SGC**

"Hey Daniel" Jack peered into Daniel's lair "go get Carter and let's get out of here."

"I've got…" Daniel gestured at piles of papers and books.

'Acch...now."

Daniel knew there was no arguing. "What about Teal'c?"

"I tried. They won't let him out to play."

"I don't think she's in the mood. I tried talking to her…"

Jack interrupted, Daniel wasn't allowed to finish one sentence.

"She doesn't need to dwell."

"Yeah, the ending of that mission was grizzly."

"The son of a bitch deserved it. He tried to manipulate them just like he tried with Carter." The whole thing made Jack angry.

"She was engaged to him?" Daniel found it hard to believe.

"Go figure. The fool thought he could control her. She's way too smart and too strong."

Daniel wondered about O'Neill assessment of Sam. "You…"

"Daniel go get her. Meet you at O'Malley's"

**O'Malley's**

Daniel arrives with Sam in tow. They slid onto bar stools alongside O'Neill.

"What are you drinking?" Daniel asked although it was obvious.

"They have Guinness on tap." O'Neill lifted the glass of dark liquid with a rich creamy head.

"Looks great, Sir. I'll have one too."

"A woman after my own heart."

"Ah, I'll have a Creme de Menthe on the rocks." Daniel said.

Jack just stared at him "You're serious?"

Sam couldn't help herself and tried desperately to suppress a laugh.

"What? I like it."

"Alcoholic toothpaste."

"Not manly enough?"

"I have stronger mouthwash."

"I'll have minty fresh breath."

"Yeah and green teeth."

"Better than that brown sludge."

"Speaking of which, what was the mystery meat today?"

They had succeeded, Sam was laughing out loud.


	4. Chapter 4

**JACK, DANIEL and SAM**

**Colorado Springs**

Jack, Daniel and Sam walked into one of Daniel's favorite haunts The Coffee Bar. They chose a booth rather than the counter, ordered black coffee for Jack, a caffe mocha for Sam and a latte macchiato with a double shot for Daniel, even selecting his favorite fresh ground blend.

"What I really want is a drink...probably not a good idea." Jack said as he drummed his fingers on the table. What Jack really wanted to do was get totally blitzed, tell those slimy snakeheads what he thought of them, then kill them all.

"Nervous Jack?" Daniel asked.

"Kinda...fate of the world hanging in the balance and all."

"You'll do fine, Sir." Sam said trying to reassure him and quell his nerves.

He glanced in Carter's direction looking quite unsettled but brightened as he noticed the server bringing their drinks. "Do they have cake?"

"No Jack, just a wide selection of coffees, even reserving your own preferred blend." Daniel smiled at the server as she placed the cups before them.

"Daniel" attracting his wandering attention "you're the one who should be doing this." Jack said.

"Behind the scenes, Jack. They need to see the face of strength - someone who's not afraid of them."

"A warrior." Sam added.

"You think I intimidate them? Or the entire SCG for that matter? If they were remotely intimidated why would we need the protection of our little gray friends." Jack said while dipping a spoon into Carter's whipped cream. She pulled her cup out of his reach trying not to slosh the contents. But the man had long arms. Half the cream was gone in one swipe.

"They see our potential, the potential to defeat them. And the Asg… little friends like you." Daniel said.

"Damned if I know why. And he's not giving me a hint about what he thinks we should do."

"As for the others" Sam said "they're all bluff, flashing eyes and outlandish outfits."

"Ridiculous outfits" O'Neill concurred.

"Hand devices, extraordinary strength, armies of Jaffa, massive ships…"

"Thanks Daniel!"

"Whoops. But you know they also hate one another."

They got up, O'Neill paid the check and left a generous tip as well. They made their way back to O'Neill's truck. Jack rubbed his chest and said "This coffee is going to give me heartburn."

"That will give you a reason to glare at them, Sir."

"Great, then they'll get all huffy and storm out." He was quiet for a moment, turned the key in the ignition and said, "What if we, ah, ya know, killed them."

"Sir, they're here in good faith for a treaty." Sam was horrified.

"Good faith?" Jack retorted.

"Sound like a great idea but it will just bring the rest of the System Lords down on our heads." Daniel said.

"Yeah, the treaty buys us time."

"Beside the heartburn, did you like the coffee?" Daniel asked.

"I think the negotiations are giving me heartburn. That place is okay but they really should get muffins or pie or something."

Daniel, the purist, just sighed.


	5. Chapter 5

**Payan **

**Edora**

Jack was just about finished for the day when Payan walked over with a jug.

"Time for a break wouldn't ya say." Payan said as he placed the jug and two mugs on some boards. The boards were balanced on two sawhorses and had been used as a workbench, a dinner table and in this case a bar.

"What'cha got?" Jack asked.

"A little something that's been fermenting for a bit. Has a bite."

"Sounds interesting." Jack sounded a bit skeptical.

Payan smiled and poured the brew filling the mugs.

"Some of the grain sprouted, couldn't let it go to waste. So I toasted it a bit, an old family recipe."

The brew was foamy, and murky and bitter and it was cool from the jug sitting in a stream.

After a sip, Jack licked his lips. He searched for words and said "This is...ah…"

"Yes it is." Payan countered.

They both drank it down and Payan poured them another.

"That house, the small one" Payan pointed to a small cottage near the woods, "Doesn't need much work. We could get it livable in short order."

They strolled over mugs in hand.

They walked in and O'Neill said "Looks nice."

The main level was one big room, spacious and airy. There was a burn mark on the ceiling over a large kitchen table. They left their drinks on the table and climbed the steep stairs to a second level, which sloped sharply due to the pitch of the roof. There was a small hallway and two bedrooms on either side. One room had a gaping hole from a small particle of the fire rain that had pierced it. It had burned it's way through the roof, ceiling and down through the floor.

"That's the worst of it. It's unoccupied now. The family that used to live here sought safety on your world."

They were back down the stairs and grabbing their mugs went back outside.

"I'll take it on for a project." Jack said.

"We need to not only rebuild our houses but rebuild our people. Our young people need to marry and have children or we will die out." Payan saw the enormity of the task before them.

Jack nodded in agreement. The village was holding on by a thread. He helped them, doing his part to restore what was vital to their survival, rebuilding their homes and barns and planting crops.

"Jack, you too should start a family." This caught Jack off guard.

"I'm sure there's a good woman here for you. This cottage could be for you and your family." Payan said as he walked toward the workbench bar.

"Oh no, no, no. I'm going home and your people will come back."

"How?" The man's pain and desperation was evident in his voice.

"They'll figure out a way." Jack said with more hope than conviction.

Payan poured them another, emptying the jug. "See you at dinner Jack." And Payan weaved his way to his home.

Jack stared at the small cottage. It held the promise for someone of a home and a family. He couldn't help but mull over Payan's words "...start a family...good woman for you…" And he let his hidden and forbidden desires surface - _what if Carter were here, what if they were stranded here together, what if..._

He had done things he wasn't proud of in order to keep his feelings for her at bay. He could see the light in her eyes, anxious to witness this spectacular event, the damned Fire Rain. He pushed her away and mocked her enthusiasm, attempting to extinguish her fire.

He spent time with Edoran woman to keep from spending every waking minute hovering over Carter.

He was a damned fool but he saw no way out. He wasn't ready to retire nor break up a kick ass team. And more than that he was so unsuitable for this brilliant and _young_ woman.

And yet…he looked again at the small cottage and saw a future he yearned for yet could never have - a home, a family and a good woman.


	6. Chapter 6

**Daniel and Jack**

It hadn't been a week since they had defused the junior Jaffa situation and recovered the remains of SG-11 and now this. Jack wondered how much more could they take.

Jack walked into Daniel's office noting Daniel was oblivious to Jack's presence.

"What ya doing?" Jack asked startling Daniel.

"Nothing, I was just… nothing really." Daniel was still somewhat despondent.

"Well, come on, let's get out of here."

"I don't feel…"

"Come on, I'm buying."

Daniel followed Jack not having the will to refuse.

Daniel was depressed and angry. He seemed to have no animus toward Carter. He seemed to forgive Teal'c but Jack wondered if Daniel was particularly angry with him. And he was the one who probably understood the most what he was going through. Jack knew how painful it was to lose someone. He lost a wife, he lost his son, his only child. He didn't want Daniel to lose heart or to leave the SGC but perhaps he needed to separate himself from the SGC to gain some equilibrium. This was where Jack had found his reason to go on.

They stopped in O'Malley's and Jack asked "Bar or a table?"

"I'm not very hungry."

Jack could hear the hopelessness in Daniel's voice.

They sat at the bar where Jack ordered a Heinekens and buffalo wings and a gin and tonic for Daniel.

"Want to talk about it?" Jack asked and prayed Daniel didn't want to.

"I'm so conflicted about the whole thing. I know intellectually I shouldn't blame Teal'c but I feel angry. I know she, Ammonet, orchestrated the whole damn thing so why couldn't she have saved Sha're. I know Sha're had some small bit of autonomy why didn't she breakfree. I miss her and I'm angry with her and I love her and want her back. Now she wants me to find the boy. God damn it, Jack, it's Apophis' kid. And I hate it, I hate it. But it's part her too, the only part I have left.

Do you have any idea how I feel?" He gulped down the drink in front of him.

"Sorta." Jack had made quite a dent in the pile of wings and was on his third beer which made him even more taciturn than usual. Tonight he opened up about an incident that had nearly broken him.

"When I was taken prisoner in Iraq, I told you about that didn't I?"

"You mentioned it." Daniel was munching on the buffalo wings more out of something to do than hunger.

"They told my wife, my wife at the time, nothing, absolutely nothing, since the whole thing was classified. But Cromwell was there, he saw me go down, he's the one that left me behind. He told her I was dead. Sara was lonely and confused and Cromwell was her only source of information. He told her to grieve then get on with life. She grew to depend on him, maybe a bit too much. After a few months I was declared KIA and Sara, well I don't know."

O'Neill drank down half the glassful.

"After the rescue and I was hospitalized for a while. Cromwell was there with Sara. I don't know if it was to ask forgiveness for abandoning me or for Sara...I was so angry. Angry at him for leaving me to rot, at Sara for depending on him, at the whole mess. I could intellectually understand but at the time I didn't want to and it sure didn't help how I felt. I didn't want to understand anyone or anything."

"I know. I know you can't help how you feel but you can help what you do. Or something like that."

"Yeah something like that. Want another drink?"

"Yes, these wings are good but really hot."

"Yup, have the rest I've lost my appetite."


	7. Chapter 7

**SAM **

**Colorado Springs**

Jack sat at the bar nursing a beer and munching on peanuts.

It wasn't an upscale place like O'Malley's or one of these places that sold craft beer to yuppies.

But the beer on tap was good and it was cold. And the floor wasn't too sticky.

The last person he expected to see strolled in, turned a few heads and sat on the barstool next to him.

Without preamble she asked "What are we going to do?"

"About what?"

She gave him a withering look.

"Damned if I know." Jack said. He grabbed a few more peanuts, his only meal of the evening.

"I tried to brush it off, sweep it under the rug."

"Run out of cliches, Carter?"

"Shove it in that damned room."

"Getting crowded in there?"

Jack caught the eye of the bartender tapped his mug of beer and pointed with his thumb to Carter.

"We just got back, maybe you should give it some time." He said.

"Oh yeah, MacKenzie will solve all our problems."

He glared as best he could.

In a hushed voice she said "All of the 'workers' were given physicals and transported to the tropical planet that we were transforming into the Beta site. They will want for nothing, so they are all settled. The reams of paperwork are filed. I've kept myself as busy as I could."

"How long has it been?" Jack asked.

"Not a week."

"Feels like yesterday"

"I feel like I got left behind." Sam sounded disconsolate.

They both stared into their beer like it held an answer to their problems.

"I miss them." Sam's voice was low and sad.

"Who, our fellow slaves?" He sounded bitter.

The look she gave him was somewhere between angry and heartbroken.

"They weren't real." Jack said although he didn't sound convinced.

"Weren't they?"

"Let's get out of here."

"Can You drive?" Sam noticed the four or five shot glasses near Jack elbow. She barely had a sip of beer.

"Probably shouldn't"

"I'll take you home." She said and he gave her a lopsided smiled. He paid the tab and they went out into the cool of the evening.

Jack folded his frame into Sam's classic Volvo and slid the passenger's seat all the way back. They were quiet during the drive to his house and he found himself inviting her in without a second thought. He did have a bit of a buzz on.

As the walked to the front door Jack asked "You're not going to take advantage of me are you?"

Sam laughed.

Sam was primed to discuss their 'problem' but she'd have to sober him up a little first. Or perhaps not. He might be more forthright if he was a bit uninhibited. Jack and Sam walked into the kitchen.

" Coffee or …" he offered as he lifted up a bottle of single malt scotch.

"Do you want coffee?"

"God no. I feel good."

Sam went about making a pot of coffee anyway, if only for something to do with her hands.

She turned to him and asked again "What should we do?"

"I know what I want."

"I supposed you should make this decision sober."

"I am." He professed.

"There were ...how many shot glasses in front of you."

"They weren't all mine."

"Hmmm, sure. Then why did you let me drive you home?"

He shrugged his shoulders and smiled.

"You're exasperating." She said.

"But you still love me."

"You'd never say that if you were sober. Drink this." She said as she handed him a cup of coffee.

"I dream about her." He spoke softly as he stared into the coffee.

"Me?"

"Well...ah... Thera...but yeah."

"I wake in the morning and look for Jonah and wonder why he's gone, why did he leave me? Doesn't he love me anymore? Or did they find out what we were doing and send him to the mines."

He placed the coffee cup on the counter. "C'mere" he said as he put his arms around her. "I'd never leave you, never. You know that. Don't cry. You're gonna make me cry and that's not good for my image."

Sam laughed her eyes full of tears. Looking at him she noticed in the kitchen light how tired he looked.

"Do you want to go to bed?" She said, not realizing how it sounded until it was out of her mouth.

The look he gave her tore at her heart.

She almost said "Sir" but it seemed cruel and the last thing she wanted to do was hurt him. Jonah encouraged her when she was thwarted, befriended her when she was lonely, loved her for herself. The man before her was this and so much more.

"You ought to go home." He said.

"Do you want me to?"

"No. But you probably should."

"Thera would never leave Jonah." Sam said.

"She would to save her world."

"I'm not sure about that."

She put her arms around him and they held on to one another as long as they could, far, far longer than was appropriate.

She said softly "If only", disengaged and went home.


	8. Chapter 8

** Harry 415**

Harry Maybourne jumped in the SUV as O'Neill pulled away from the curb and sped off. They hadn't gone ten miles when Harry began to whine.

"Jack, I'm starving. Prison food is lousy."

"Cryin' out loud, Harry, we don't have the time."

"Make time, Jack. And that's not our only problem." Harry Maybourne was busily pulling out wires from under the dash board.

O'Neill glanced over to the tangled mess "What the hell are you doing?"

"Trackers, gotta...Jack, pull over there round the back of that bar."

Harry pulled a few gizmos dangling from the wire from under the dash, got out of the car, went around checking the wheel wells and the undercarriage. A man climbed into a pickup parked next to them and as he pulled out Harry tossed a small handful of electronics into the back.

"Got 'em all?"

"Good to go."

Not thirty miles later "Jack, we need to stop."

"Yeah, okay. We need gas, this things a pig."

They stopped at a gas station. Jack filled the tank and called in to Daniel.

In an adjoining lot was bar and grill with an open air section complete with picnic tables. There was Harry Maybourne, recently a prisoner, sucking down a beer and wolfing down hot dogs.

"Who'd they put in charge?" Maybourne asked with his mouth full.

Jack ended the call flipping his phone shut. "You know a General Bauer?"

"Ech, at the SGC." Harry sounded incredulous. "Who's life is he making miserable?"

"Carter, Daniel, Teal'c, everybody." Jack was not happy.

"She'll be all right, Jack. He's just a toady."

"Who's pulling his strings?"

"Oh that one's easy - Kinsey. Sure you don't want a dog Jack?"

O'Neill shook his head sure the combination of Maybourne, Kinsey and a hot dog would not sit well. "Okay that's where we're going. We've gotta keep on moving."

"I got rid of the tracking devices." Maybourne said while munching on a frankfurter.

"You've heard of licence plates? Weren't you recently making them?"

"No one's looking for us yet."

"I wouldn't be so sure of that. Look how many showed up at your hidey hole."

"Got a plan?" Harry asked as he shoved the rest of a second weiner down his throat.

"I'm working on it."

"We'll probably get shot the minute we walk into Kinsey's house anyway."


	9. Chapter 9

**TEAL'C**

Colorado Springs

Jack handed Carter the two steaming pizza's he had been drooling over on the drive over to her house. He was surprised when she closed the door in his face.

He was ready for some lunch and Teal'c made an excellent suggestion. They could get some lunch and a drink and forget Carter had better things to do than spend the afternoon with them.

Teal'c called Daniel and they picked him up on the way to the strip club. Prudently they didn't tell Daniel exactly where they were going until they pulled into the parking lot.

They started out toward the bar but were directed toward a table, it was early and there was plenty of room. O'Neill paid the cover charge and they found a table ring side, hopefully out of the splatter zone.

"This is not my usual thing." Daniel was definitely out of his element.

"Teal'c was curious. It's a cultural experience."

"Cultural!?" Daniel found that hard to believe.

A scantily clad waitress approached and O'Neill chatted her up.

"O'Neill was distressed by Major Carter's rejection of his offer?"

"Of?"

"What you you gentlemen like from the bar?" The perky waitress asked.

Jack began to order "I'll have a beer. Murray here will have an orange juice." The waitress looked askance, they did make their money on alcohol.

"And Daniel...Daniel?" who was not paying attention.

"Oh...ah... I'll have a Mai Tai."

"And could you bring us an order of nachos, better make that two." Jack added.

As the waitress turned to go she flirted with Teal'c by trying to take his hat. He rammed it down hard on his head.

O'Neill by way of an apology to the young woman said "It's a religious thing."

"Oh sorry," She said as she scampered off to the bar.

Teal'c continued to Daniel "I sought to distract O'Neill from Major Carter seeing another man."

"Really."

"She did not allow us in her home."

Although it seemed he wasn't paying attention to the conversation Jack said "She deserves to have a personal life."

The drinks and nachos arrived as did the bikini clad wrestler approached the ring and the entertainment began.

"O'Neill, I do not believe these women are wrestling in earnest."

"Want to give them some lessons?" O'Neill was sure Teal'c was aware of this before they walked in.

Another rounds of drinks arrived in short order. Teal'c ate the wedges of pineapple and cherries of the veritable fruit salad that decorated Daniel's drinks.

"O'Neill is the purpose of this venue merely to titillate the men here."

"It's entertainment. Not wrestling. And not about jello either."

It was easy with the guys. When they went out to a bar for a few beers and tell tall tales and share a meal it felt like comradery. With a woman, especially Carter, taking her out for drinks and a meal, it would have felt like flirtation.

Would he have ever, in his wildest moments, brought Carter to a strip club? Would he have had the nerve to ask? Would Carter have gone with them or read them the riot act for going to a place so demeaning to women.

He thought this place would make him feel better. It didn't. He had another beer.


	10. Chapter 10

**JACK**

Colorado Springs

"Hey Jack" Daniel greeted his friend as Jack strolled into O'Malley's and took a seat at the bar.

"I see you started without me." Jack said as he pointed at the pink concoction in front of Daniel. "Where's Teal'c?"

"He's brooding."

"Worse than with Shau'nac?"

"He was hopeful." Daniel replied

"Yeah." Jack said "He wanted the burden off his back. Who could blame him? And, well, he trusted that son of a bitch."

"Bra'tac did too."

As the bartender started toward them from the far end of the bar Jack noted the nearly empty glass in front of Daniel and asked "What is that? What are you drinking?"

"Strawberry daiquiri."

"Sir?" the bartender addressed Jack.

"Hmm… I'll have...ah...what's on tap? Oh and he'll have another one of" Jack pointed at Daniel's drink as if it were a roach "those."

The bartender went through the list and Jack made his selection.

"Where's Sam?" Daniel asked, looking around as if he missed her coming in with Jack.

"I don't know." Jack said.

"Why didn't you bring her?"

"Why didn't you?"

The bartender brought the drinks. O'Neill looked at the pureed fruit and alcohol in the fancy glass in front of Daniel and asked the bartender "What, no umbrella?" The bartender rolled his eyes and stalked off.

"She's getting a lift later so she can drive us home."

"Good, let's run a tab." Jack said, then added, "Wait a minute, didn't you just asked me where she was? How many of these have you had?"

Daniel smiled.

The bartender returned and glared at the two men. With that the bartender plopped a ruffled toothpick with three strawberries, a wedge of lime, a straw and a garish umbrella in Daniel's drink.

"You talk to Carter all the time, do you always understand what's she talking about?" Jack asked as he snatched the toothpick with the strawberries from Daniel's drink.

"Sometimes. And sometimes her theories, you think you have your mind wrapped around it and poof. It's like a stone dropped in a pond."

"Yeah" Jack agreed "nothing left but the ripples. Her stuff is incomprehensible, your's is just boring."

"Thanks a lot. Oh yeah and sometimes I don't listen." Daniel admitted.

"Really. She made me watch this show on String Theory."

"Made you?" Daniel was totally incredulous.

"It was after the barbecue a few weeks ago. You and Teal'c hightailed it out when we were cleaning up. She glanced at her watch and said there's this show she didn't want to miss."

"We helped. And that's such a lame excuse to…"

"Don't go there."

"So?"

"I kinda thought I was following what they were saying. When it was over she looks at me and asked what I thought of it. I couldn't string two words together."

Daniel laughed.

It wasn't that funny but Jack appreciated the laugh from his tipsy friend. "I couldn't remember a damned thing."

"She's confusing you again? Ever think she's doing it on purpose?" Daniel asked.

"She must think I'm an idiot."

"Women think most men are idiots."

"She doesn't think you're an idiot." Jack said.

"She's not in love with me either."

"Daniel." There was a bit of command, a bit of anger and a tad of desperation in his voice. "How about another round? How about some nachos too?"

Later, much later, when Sam finally arrived she could hear the Colonel and Daniel laughing. Daniel had amassed quite a collection of colorful mini umbrellas and was spilling half his drink on the way to his mouth. Sam look slightly dismayed at the inebriated men. She was dismayed and yet had a fleeting wish she were there laughing with them.

"It's been a tough couple of months." O'Neill said. He paid the tab and tossed Sam his keys.


	11. Chapter 11

**Felger**

"Ah come on Carter, Felger and Combes think we're going to take them out for a drink." O'Neill was whining desperately.

"I didn't invite them." Sam was not getting involved in this.

"They invited themselves."

"So not my problem." Whoops, she should have tacked on a sir.

"Seriously, you're going to leave me alone with Felger and Combes and Jonas, too."

"I thought you liked Jonas, Sir"

"He smiles too much."

"Enjoy your evening Colonel."

"Carter, am I going to have to order you?" O'Neill decided to try stern.

"I think that would be highly irregular, Sir." She was beginning to enjoy his plight.

"Are you smiling?" He couldn't believe Sam was enjoying this. She was supposed to have his six on all occasions, not only battle.

She could barely suppress a giggle. "No Sir."

"You can handle Felger and I'll run interference."

"Not a chance." She held her finger down on the button for the elevator.

"Please. I'll owe you one. They saved our lives." He was grasping at straws.

Sam hopped in the elevator and pressed the door close button. And said cheerfully "Good night, Sir" as the doors shut.

A/N: Sorry, we never got to the bar.


	12. Chapter 12

**JACK**

**Washington D.C.**

O'Neill had a meeting about hmm, he glanced at his watch, now. He needed to get away from the impromptu press conference. And he needed to wash the stench, the taint of Kinsey away.

Kinsey tried to shut down the SGC.

Kinsey threatened Hammond's family and put that clown Bauer in his place.

Kinsey pushed for a relationship with the Aschen.

Kinsey had to be behind the NID.

And now Kinsey wanted to use Jack to pave his road to the White House.

This man was a threat not only to the SCG but to the security of Earth. And the thought of Kinsey in ultimate political power troubled O'Neill.

And Jack was sure Kinsey's interference was not at an end.

Jack walked into a bar and used the restroom and thoroughly scrubbed his hands especially the one that shook Kinsey's hand. Even the thought of Kinsey touching him made him annoyed.

Jack sat at the bar and ordered whatever was on tap and icy cold. And to stop the incessant ringing snapped open his phone.

He barely barked "O'Neill" out.

"Sir, where are you?" In the space before he answered her question, which seemed like minutes, Sam was sure she heard the clinking of ice and drinks being ordered.

"Soon, I'll be there soon." He snapped his flip phone closed and loosened his tie.

Another man slid onto the bar stool next to him.

"Hey, are you that guy?"

O'Neill raised his eyebrow and look skeptical at the man.

"No"

"It was on that cable station. The Air Force officer that endorsed Kinsey. I hate that son of a bitch."

"You hate the Air Force officer?" Jack asked.

"No...well maybe. I hate Kinsey."

"Well, wasn't me. I never get involved in politics."

"I bet it was all a charade to get votes."

"I wouldn't doubt it."

O'Neill downed his beer. Paid his tab, straightened his tie, and grabbed his cover.

He may as well go to his meeting, wherever the hell it was. He always got lost in this town. Sometimes intentionally.

And the damned phone was ringing again.


	13. Chapter 13

**702 Daniel's Return**

"So how was that for getting thrown in the deep end?" Jack asked as he perched on the bar stool next to Daniel. "Drive you to drink?"

"It's so strange, somethings I remember, don't have to think about, like on the mission. It all came naturally. And other things, things here, there is just a whisper, a hint of what they are, what they mean." Daniel was in a reflective mood.

Jack wanted to tell Daniel it would all come back but how did he know. And he didn't want to give his friend false hope. He ordered a Guineas and a shot of Jameson on the side. "What's with all the leaves?" He asked looking at Daniel's drink.

"Looked interesting, kinda minty tasting. It's a Mojito, I think that's what they called it." Daniel squeezed a wedge of lime into his drink.

Daniel looked around at the many couples enjoying themselves and asked Jack "Who was that woman?"

Jack looked around wondering what he meant and finally asked "Sam? Sha're?"

"No, I know who they are. There's some woman on a" Daniel needed to watch his references in public "in a village, that you…"

"Laira?"

"Yeah, you...ah...have...had a relat…"

"No, Daniel. That's the past." Jack didn't want to talk about this but it seemed important to help reintegrate Daniel with the present. Jack signaled the bartender.

"Are you still alone? You okay?"

"Sorta. Seems like a damned lone time ago. Laira was kinda, not quite aggressive but persistent. If I had to stay there we could have made something of it. Do you remember what happened?"

"You were stranded...for a long time?" Daniel was struggling to put the memories all together.

"I told her I'd come back. There was supposed to be a treaty."

"Didn't we send SG-9 the diplomatic unit there?" Daniel said.

"This you remember!" Jack was amazed at the spotty nature of Daniel's memory. "Yeah, I suggested Hammond send that team."

"Didn't want to face her?" Daniel asked.

Jack sighed. "She wanted a child. I had been there for months and we got to know one another. But that last night she asked, I...I was drunk."

Daniel looked at the three empty shot glasses in front of O'Neill.

Jack noticed his glance and said "Homemade hooch, god awful and potent. Like I said I was really drunk. Not saying I wasn't tempted, not saying I didn't want to at the time. I didn't think I was ever getting back."

"You didn't think we'd move heaven and Earth to find you? I do remember how we felt about one another."

"I guess I gave up hope. Seemed more realistic at the time." Jack said quietly.

"It's not a moral failing. It's only human. I know how that feels." Daniel thought of his recent foray in another direction.

"I didn't think it was possible to get home. I was...I don't… most of them hated me at first. After a while they accepted me and I accepted fate."

"You really don't know Sam, do you?"

Jack smiled at Daniel's statement. In fact he had a much better idea of his second's loyalty and determination.

"She worked day and night...for you. And Teal'c risked his life."

"Your memory coming back?" Jack asked. And he wondered if Daniel had memories of his trip to the realm of the Ascended.

"Jack, am I supposed to take this branch out of my glass? The leaves hit my nose when I try to drink?"

Jack tried not to laugh. "That's why I stick to the easy stuff." And he took a long swallow.

"You know how memories are stronger when mixed with emotions."

"I've heard that." Jack knew that very well. His most painful experiences were memories that often assailed him.

"I remember Teal'c hated that guy… not Maybourne. Well I don't think he particularly liked Maybourne. But...May…"

"Makepeace?"

"Yeah, Makepeace. Why was he in command of SG-1? Anyway T would walk away not a split second after the last syllable was out of Makepeace's mouth. He was not happy."

"You don't remember the subterfuge thing?"

"You abandoned us." Daniel said.

"No. It wasn't like that. I was ordered…"

Daniel didn't let Jack finish "It was worse. Sam looked pole-axed, then she was angry. It seemed like she complied. She 'yes sired' him and saluted but her heart wasn't in it. She disappeared into her lab."

"She does that, still does that." Jack said.

The bartender refreshed their drinks and brought them a bowl of popcorn.

"She bounced back pretty quick." Jack added

"I think, after a while, she realized it was just a sham. Teal'c too."

"Not you?" Jack asked.

"You cut me to the quick. Sha're was gone...you broke my... For me the only thing left was the novelty of the missions. I didn't care anymore." Daniel's voice alone sent pangs of guilt through Jack.

"Is that why you left?"

"I was treading water. Maybe I felt like you on that pla...oops...village, abandoned and adrift, without hope, looking for something to hold on to. Sha're was gone. My best friend washed his hands of me. It all started to weigh me down. Eventually I got an offer I couldn't refuse."

"You're back?" Jack asked, hesitated and asked again "Are you back for good?"

"Couldn't do anything there." Daniel said. With a smile as he waved around the mint sprig he admitted "And I got kicked out."

"Do you know why?" Jack was curious.

"Couldn't forget my friends. Couldn't stop meddling."

Daniel took a deep breath and said "We're going to need a ride home."


	14. Chapter 14

**JACK & DANIEL **

**After Fragile Balance and Lifeboat and Revisions**

Jack slid onto the barstool next to Daniel and said "Should you be drinking?"

Daniel looked at Jack and replied "You kidding? Probably should never stop."

"That bad?" Jack winced.

"You were there, you saw, didn't you?"

"Yeah. How you doing? Headache? Any of them still knocking around up there?"

Daniel was in no mood for humor of the O'Neill variety. "Very funny. But no. I feel like a mass murder."

"Shit. You couldn't live like that, Daniel. They invaded you."

"Yeah, I feel that way too. Violated."

"What are you drinking?" Jack asked after ordering his usual.

"It's a Mudslide."

"Looks like a malted. Fattening?"

The bartender walked over placed a glass of Guinness in front of O'Neill and placed a skewer with banana slices into Daniel's drink.

"I guess. How did you feel like after the clone...cloning thing?"

"Just what the world needs - another me walking around. If they had any sense they'd've cloned Carter."

"You're twin fantasy?" Daniel asked.

"How do you...never mind."

"Maybe they did. Did you think of that?" Daniel asked.

"What! No, I'd...they...shit. The little bastard probably asked for…" Jack was ready to jump in his truck and find his clone.

"Relax, I was just kidding. But if you die on the next mission there'll be a spare."

"That's plain nuts. And thanks for the vote of confidence. When you die you should stay dead." Jack said.

"Really. Where would you or I be then? Should it be like that mission where people left and no one remembered they ever existed." Daniel brooded. Who would remember him beside Jack, Sam and Teal'c.

"You're beginning to worry me. You sound like me." Jack said.

"Scary, huh?"

For a while they concentrated on the drinks in front of them.

"Want something to eat?" Jack asked.

"This is kinda filling." Daniel was munching on the bananas. "How's Sam doing? After I, ya know, came back I was kinda confused about things. I could feel these vibes but didn't know…"

"Daniel"

"I don't mean Major Carter, I mean Sam. She didn't want to come out with us tonight."

"I don't know. She was furious with me for letting you go play with Oma. And then seemed normal again and then she'd withdraw." Jack said.

"Something happen to cause that?"

"You mean what did I do." Jack said.

"Well, yeah."

Jack drained his glass and ordered another. "It was after the alien…"

"Martouf?" Daniel asked.

"No, a glowy guy, kinda like you. He had a thing for Carter, made himself human again for her. We...ah...thought she was losing it, ya know, nuts."

"That must have endeared her to you."

"And she didn't want me hanging around." O'Neill sounded a bit hurt though he masked it well.

"Geeze, I need to read all the report from last year." Daniel said sounding confused.

"This happened before you left, don't you remember?"

"Still a little fuzzy on some details."

"Built a gate in her basement, ring a bell?"

"Really!" That was amazing thought Daniel and he wondered what knowledge he might have access to.

"He sacrificed himself for her." Jack would do this for Carter without hesitation.

"Smart and self-sacrificing, did she love him?"

"He lived with her...so...I guess." The memory of this hurt Jack still. "We raided her house. What a mess." Jack thought about how he had royally screwed up things with Carter.

"It was Simmons fault. I couldn't stop him, a total clusterfuck. Maybe you should read all those reports - Simmons got what was coming to him."

"So, Jack, how's Sam?"

"After that settled down, things yo-yoed for a while. I thought things were good then she'd get all formal or distant. You know, absorbed in her work."

"Absorbed in her work! Jack, that's Sam."

"We had some awful missions and a lot of good one. Don't know if it makes up for the disasters. And she's struggling with the concept of having a normal life."

"Us, a normal life." Daniel actually laughed.

"I thought she would perk up after you came back."

Daniel bit his lip to keep from saying it was O'Neill whom Carter wanted in her life and that was her major struggle.

"She never takes time off and when she did, it blew up in her face. I'm afraid she'll burn out. She's probably struggling with the uncertainty of this life. She should probably be reassed to R&D. It would be somewhat safer." Jack said.

"We need her. We need her here at the SGC, on SG-1." Daniel said.

"Yeah, I know I...we need her and her amazing mind but what does she need?"

"Now you sound like me." Daniel said.


	15. Chapter 15

**Kerry 803**

The base had recently been reopened and one of its first visitors was Kerry Johnson of the C.I.A. There were international repercussions from the 'death' of the Russian soldier. There were rumors of granting another Alien permission to live among the general population. The girl, Cassandra was human and blended in but a Jaffa posed problems. And more than all of that Kerry was anxious to congratulate the new commander of the SGC and spanking new Brigadier General Jack O'Neill, a man who needed to put his own stamp on the SGC.

Long past 1900 hours there was a knock on O'Neill's open office door. He looked up from the stacks of folders and smiled, a distraction from the drudgery of paperwork.

"General O'Neill" Kerry's voice was bright and conveyed warmth.

"Ma'am" Jack answered.

"Really." The military honorific 'Ma'am' made her feel ancient but her smile was lovely and sincere. "I'd like to take you out to dinner to celebrate your promotion and appointment."

He ruffled the stack of folders piled on his desk.

"They'll be there tomorrow." She said.

"That's what I'm afraid of. And they multiply overnight, multiply like rabbits."

She laughed. "Don't I know it. Come on, I've eaten in most every spot in Colorado Springs and most of them are superior to the mess here or a stale sandwich at your desk."

A real meal was certainly tempting. He thought about keeping his class A's on to make this a tad formal but didn't want to attract attention to them.

Kerry suggested the bar and grill at her hotel. "The food is good. We can be relaxed and it's certainly convenient."

At dinner their conversation stuck to the mundane. He limited himself to one beer with his meal, he has to drive, never mind be careful around the CIA.

He met the agent before. During Hammond's command of the SGC he had been introduced when she was first assigned. And again, mere months ago, after he had his head sucked again, Kerry had informed General Hammond and SG-1 of the imminent appointment of Dr. Elizabeth Weir. Although Senator Kinsey tried to strong arm Weir, Kerry let them know Weir was a strong willed intelligent woman and would not be cowed by him.

There were topics of a classified nature she wished to discuss so Kerry suggested they decamp to her room which was equipped with an apparatus that would block all listening devices. She got down to business and was quite professional. Many topics were discussed - objectives, proposed missions, personal with possibility of an infiltration of spies, Allies and the strength of the Goa'uld and the possible emergence of a new threat the Lucian alliance. Jack felt burdened and exhausted, his new job seemed overwhelming.

And then there's a little flirting, primarily on her part. He was wary. She was an attractive woman. She was unafraid of relationships and had no ties that bind beside the Company. His wariness makes him an even more desirable conquest in her eyes. When Kerry offered him bourbon from the mini bar, O'Neill made the excuse he had to drive home.

"Not going back to the base? You don't have to drive all that way home, you could stay over." She said with a hand on his arm a little too up close and personal.

"Who'll let the dog out?" O'Neill said.

"You don't have a dog." She said with a twinkle in her eye.

"_Maybe I ought to get one." He thought. The man was sorely tempted._


	16. Chapter 16

**3 ALIENS**

Daniel and Jack sat in Jack's office for a private briefing. "You're back early. So how'd it go?" Jack asked.

"Where were you? I thought you'd show up since it was your idea." Daniel asked.

"I got a long, long talking to about showing favoritism to members of my command." O'Neill groused.

"What are they going to say when you marry Sam?"

"What? She's engaged to that cop."

"What?" Daniel was incredulous.

"Did you forget everything?"

"No...I...nevermind."

"Do you know something from…" Jack gestured upward with his hands. He knew even if it seemed you had forgotten everything, say after coming back from something like being ascended or having ancient information downloaded into your head, occasionally something would pop unbidden into you mind.

"No, I don't think so. It's been over a year Jack."

"Where did you take them?" O'Neill got down to business.

"Am I going to have to write a report?" Daniel whined.

"In triplicate." Jack said thumbing the stack of folders on his desk.

"They wanted to go downtown to the Smoothie Bar."

"Good, no alcohol. Did they remember to bring money?"

Daniel laughed. "Of course, Teal'c informed them of 'Earth policies of exchange of goods and services'. I sat at another table so I didn't cramp their style."

"What'd they have?"

"Jonas was a booster for Earth fruit and pushed the banana coconut smoothies, Nyan had something with strawberries and guavas and Teal'c had some green sludge."

"I guess I could pass on that." Jack said.

"Oh, and Jack, Teal'c told a joke."

"A joke, do tell." O'Neill loved a good joke.

"As they walked in he said 'Three aliens walked into a bar'."

Jack laughed out loud.

"Nyan laughed and Jonas didn't get it. Teal'c actually smiled."

"So it was a success. They didn't attract too much attention, did they?" Jack would probably have to write a report as well. God, he hated the reams of paperwork.

"No more than anybody else there."

"Really?" Jack could not believe that.

"Kinda like some guys from out of state, far, far out of state." Daniel smiled and shook his head.

"What did you have?" Jack was just curious.

"There's a coffee bar sharing space with the smoothie bar so I had a mochachino with a double shot. It was great so I brought back one for Sam too." Daniel said.

"Why didn't you bring me one?"

"Don't want to be accused of currying favor with the powers that be. Anyway, you could of come."


	17. Chapter 17

**813 It's Good to be King**

After the unpleasantness with Ares' Jaffa, King Arkhan, aka Harry Maybourne, invited Jack to the local tavern.

"Come on Jack. We have excellent Ales and Stouts." Harry gestured to his realm and said "Just think you could retire here, all of you. It's great."

"It might be a tad too, dare I say, 'primitive' for Carter." Jack winced, hoping not to be too insulting.

They sat down at a wooden bench where a barmaid approached. "How may I serve you today sire?"

"I would like a flagon of you finest ale and a sampling of your stout and ales for my friend. Oh and some nachos." King Arkhan requested.

She smiled and went off to fill their order.

"Nachos?" O'Neill queried.

"I may have brought my people some innovations. Jack, just think what Carter and Daniel could do here. They would have a field day creating a modern society. Skip all the errors of the past, blow past the fossil fuel stage. Daniel can decipher the monoliths. Who knows what's written there."

The drinks and nachos appeared and both dug right in.

"They both can do that as members of the SGC." Jack wasn't interested in Harry's offers but was most interested in the two tankards before him.

"You could all retire here. The stout's pretty good isn't it?"

"It's great." Jack said as the barmaid refilled his tankard. "But Harry, we have jobs, obligations…"

"With my ship you could anywhere, any century." Harry knew this would be a definite lure for Daniel Jackson.

"And we can take that ancient ship." Jack asserted.

"Don't even think of stealing my ship." Harry was indignant.

"You can't fly it."

"I'd consider letting you borrow it for a mere…" Harry said calculating the possible profit.

"Aah Harry, bargain with the bean counters."

"You know that ship wasn't built here. There's a tale it came from the past, people escaping from…"

"Don't care, tell Daniel." Jack said as he scarfed the last nacho.

"They say they're the ones, the time travelers, that carved the monoliths. And as for the ship I haven't tested my people to see if any of them can get it to work. They usually avoid that whole area. Did I tell you some of the Tollan are here."

"What? Their Stargate was destroyed in the attack by Tanith. I thought they were pretty much toast." Jack said.

"You remember that time the Nox woman, Lya was there?"

"Sure, we were there for that."

"I think she and perhaps the whole affair sparked a little bit of wariness in the naive Narim."

"Naivety or was it arrogance?"

"Whatever Narim had a ship hidden on the outskirts of the city. When the city got blown to hell. He and the few survivors made it here. They were in rough shape by the time we found them. They are pretty standoffish still but are working on shield for our planet."

"Works great Harry." Jack said referencing the recent attack by Ares.

"Obviously it's not done yet. Carter would be interested."

"Yeah, let's not tell her yet."

"So Jack, what do you think about retiring here."

"It's not Minnesota, Harry. Where, by the, I have a sweet little cabin by a sweet little lake."

"I'm the king. You could have a mansion on a large lake." With a grin Maybourne added "And with 4 wives. Or would that be too primitive for Carter?"


	18. Chapter 18

**JACOB**

Jacob walked into the bar looking for Jack O'Neill. Knowing he wasn't long for this world Jacob was loathe to possibly upset Sam's plans. And he had always been hesitant to speak so forthrightly to O'Neill and interfere in their personal lives.

But then he met Sam's intended.

He called Jack.

Jack was seated at the end of the bar sipping a beer. A seat next to him was free. Jacob sat and said "Maybe we should get a table and we're gonna need something stronger."

Jack though if he were wise he leave right now. But he asked "What's up Jacob?"

There was no way they would be discussing Galactic affairs in a Colorado Springs bar and grill.

"What happened to Dad, Jack?"

"Okay, Dad." Jack was beginning to get nervous.

"Have you met that... guy?"

Jack could play dumb, he knew exactly to whom Jacob was refering. However Jacob seemed to be in a no nonsense mood.

"Yeah...once." He said hesitantly, trying to figure out where this conversation was headed.

"What did you think?" Just from the tone of Jacob's voice Jack knew Jacob's assessment. So Jack weaseled out.

"It's not my call."

"Bullshit." Jacob was working up a lather.

"Jacob, it's Sam's life."

"And your going to let her throw it away?"

"Jacob"

"Don't you love her?"

"Of course I…shit" Jack blew it and Jacob sat there looking smug.

"Are you really going to sit back and let this happen?"

"You're her father."

"She doesn't listen to me."

Jack signaled to the bartender and asked Jacob "You still drink?"

As the bartender approached Jacob asked for water. Then said to Jack "Selmak doesn't even like coffee."

"That's gotta be tough."

"I'm kinda used to it...almost. You know…" Jacob waited a second to get Jack's full attention, " you'll do almost anything for someone you love."

"Including letting them make up their own minds, Jacob."

"A person needs all the facts to make an informed decision. She's a scientist you know. She needs to know everything, Jack. I want her to have everything she has ever wanted. I want her to be happy."

"I do too, Jacob, I do too." Jack said softly as he stared into his drink.

* * *

Another man walked into the same bar and sauntered over to his new colleagues.

A group of men, buddies from the Springs police force, were seated at a table in the far corner. One of them addressed their newest member, a transfer from Denver.

"How's it hanging Shanny?"

Pete didn't answer. He was distracted by two men seated at the bar. He could swear one was Sam's boss and the other, her father. They seemed quite friendly toward one another. He gave a thought to go over and say hi but neither one seemed very warm and friendly toward him when he had met them before. Actually both seemed stiff and standoffish if not downright dismissive of him. No matter, he'd probably see them at the wedding.

It occurred to him, hadn't Sam blown him off from meeting his new buddies with the excuse that her dad was in town and she wanted to spend time with him? And the old man was sitting not twenty feet from him.

"Hey guys" Pete said as he tried for a smile. He pulled up a chair and grabbed the pitcher of beer on the table and poured himself a glassful.

As his buddies chatted his insides churned. He had made the down payment on the house just this morning, the invitations were sent, the flowers were ordered. And he had a sudden feeling of unease about Sam's commitment to him.

"Hey Shanny, you look worried." said his partner.

"Wedding jitters?" said another.

"Give him another beer." They all agreed on that.

Pete smiled and thought wait til she sees the house, she'll be blown away. Pete was feeling a lot more confident.


End file.
